Advice for young mothers: how to teach your baby to sleep in his own crib. How to teach a child to sleep in his own crib? How to teach your baby to sleep in a crib at night

In the modern world, a lot of attention is paid to the mental health of a child. Therefore, many pediatricians, as well as breastfeeding specialists, advise putting the baby to sleep next to the mother, especially in the first few months of life. In this way, the emotional connection becomes stronger, and mother does not need to get out of bed to see if her treasure is sleeping, if it has opened, or if it has frozen...

But time passes and after some time of sleeping together, it becomes clear that something needs to be done about it, because getting enough sleep is now not easy. And only a few know how to properly start teaching a child to sleep separately from his mother in his own crib, so as not to accidentally cause irreparable harm to the baby’s psyche.

Where to begin?

There are no general recommendations on what age to stop co-sleeping. It all depends on the personal characteristics of the child. Some children, from birth, can easily fall asleep in their crib, separately from their mother, while others, even at 4 years old, need to sleep with their mother.

The child is completely ;
The baby's night sleep lasts at least 5-6 in a row ();
During the day, the baby spends less than 1/3 of the total time in his mother’s arms ();
If he wakes up alone in bed, it will not cause crying or hysterics;
A possessive instinct appeared (“mine” or “not mine”);
The child can spend at least ten to fifteen minutes alone in the room.

When should you not force your child to sleep separately?

You need to postpone this difficult psychological moment if your baby:

Born premature, before term;
Born by caesarean section;
They suffered a birth trauma;
Has signs of increased intracranial pressure;
Has signs of developmental delay;
Has signs of various skin diseases such as eczema, dermatitis, etc.
Has high excitability, is tearful, and irritable.

If your baby has at least one of the above signs, you should think about extending co-sleeping with him, because he has a greater need for this than his peers.

In addition, you should not “relocate” a child during the active phase, immediately after an illness, if the baby is just potty training or has just started attending kindergarten.

All these events are already very stressful for the little man. There is no need to overload the child’s psyche even more.

Note to moms!

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Accustoming a child to sleep in his own crib separately is not an easy, but feasible task. You need to be mentally prepared in advance for the fact that from time to time the baby will still come in the middle of the night (if your baby is) to the parent’s bed in search of reassurance, affection and warmth. All this must be treated with great understanding and patience.

Doctor Komarovsky advises: with whom should a child sleep?

Getting used to sleeping separately

No matter how strange it may sound, the first thing you need to pay attention to is the mother’s sincere desire to sleep separately from the child. Over a long period of sleeping together, the mother could have become very accustomed to this, and now subconsciously does not want to leave. This internal resistance and anxiety can be passed on to the baby, and then it will become very difficult to teach him to sleep separately.

Remove the side of the crib and move the crib next to yours so that the crib is like an extension of yours (you can buy a special add-on crib for newborn babies). This will create the illusion that the baby is still with the mother. After the baby learns to sleep in his new territory, the crib can be gradually moved further and further from the parent’s bed, up to moving to the adjacent children’s room.

Read a detailed article on the topic: the baby is always nearby - additional cots for newborns. How to choose. Popular brands -

Important points

Talk to your baby. Usually, all children enjoy the process of growing up. Buy it and tell your daughter or son that only little children sleep with their mothers, while adults sleep in their own beds. This method works great for 2-3 year old toddlers.
For the first time, so that it is not so scary for the baby to fall asleep alone, you can turn on a special night light. Nowadays there are many lamps and projectors on sale that will make the process of going to bed not only comfortable, calm, but also very interesting.
To make the process of putting the baby to bed easier, you can develop a special ritual: hygiene procedures - fairy tale - sleep. If you adhere to such a sequence that in a month the question will no longer arise in front of you: “How to put a child to sleep in his own crib?”
If you are planning the birth of a second baby, then you will need to move the eldest one into a separate crib before the birth of the youngest one. Otherwise, changing the place of overnight stay may cause a storm of protests and attacks of jealousy on the part of the first-born.
It would be better to time the move to your own crib to coincide with some occasion: Birthday, New Year, milestone anniversary (for example, 2 years and 6 months).
Let your baby also be involved in choosing his own crib. Take it with you to the furniture store. And if mom and dad listen to his opinion, then this purchase will be even closer and it will be much easier to get used to sleeping in it.

Try to exercise your baby in the evening . When the child is able to walk and run, give him freedom and freedom. Let him jump and run around. Until he gets tired. If your miracle is still a baby, try to give him a massage during the day or perform gymnastics.
Educational, emotional games - a great way to tire a child, but only in the first half of the day.
Go to bed around 9-10 pm .
Before dinner you should take a walk in the fresh air .
After the walk you can give your baby a bath . He also spends a lot of energy on bathing.
Monitor the temperature in the room . The best temperature for children is 18-20 degrees.
The child must eat enough in the evening , otherwise he will wake up at night to eat.
Look, suddenly the baby is uncomfortable sleeping on the pillow . Choose one that fits your head size.
The baby should not sleep on its stomach . Watch your sleeping posture.
Swaddle your newborn .

What can't you do?

When putting a baby over 6 months of age to bed, there are some things you should not do

Rock in your arms.
Sing in a loud voice.
Place in the stroller, shaking it at the same time.
Rocking in bed.
Touch, stroke, touch the baby.
Offer or at the first call give something to drink or eat at night.

All of the above actions lead to a close bond between mother and child. He will sense you, feel you and will not want to give up your presence over time.

I shared my experience with you. I hope my tips are useful. Of course, teaching a child to sleep independently is difficult; it takes time and effort. But it is still possible.

If you follow my principles and rules, you can finally sleep with your husband in a separate room and have peace of mind about your baby’s sleep.

The question of how to teach a child to fall asleep on his own in a crib begins to worry parents approximately six months after the baby is born. Most often, mothers prefer to sleep with the baby together, since there is no need to get out of bed at night to feed. Before teaching a child to sleep separately from his parents, it is necessary to carefully study the opinions and advice of pediatricians with extensive experience in this field.

In contact with

Process Features

Not all parents have problems putting their children in their crib. Weaning will be required if the baby previously had constant close contact with his mother and father. First of all, you should decide on the age that is considered optimal for this process.

Important! Many psychologists agree that a period of six to eight months is considered optimal.

As the baby grows older, he no longer needs to be fed at night. That is why mom and dad may think about how to teach their child to sleep in his own crib.

Until six months, mommy should also control the breathing process. Thanks to this, it is possible to minimize the likelihood that the baby will suffocate.

To understand how to teach a child to sleep separately from his parents, you need to follow simple and effective tips:

The process should only be started if the number of awakenings per night does not exceed 2 times.
The baby is already eating adult food, and his mother breastfeeds him no more than three times a day.
After waking up, the baby is not afraid, but behaves calmly.
The baby does not experience discomfort if left alone for 20 minutes.
The baby was born on time. He was not diagnosed with any abnormalities in the development of internal organs and systems.
Before teaching a child to sleep separately from his parents, it is necessary to analyze the moment. It must be appropriate. The baby should not experience any additional stress.

Important! The baby should not be deprived of the necessary contact with his mother and feel protected

During training, you should demonstrate to the baby all the advantages of this process.

Expert opinion

Immediately after birth, a baby requires a lot of attention. Komarovsky knows better than anyone how to accustom a child to a crib. The TV doctor does not recommend that parents forget about their needs and comfort. They should rest well at night, then during the day they will have enough strength to care for and play. Each mother will have to decide for herself exactly when to transfer her son or daughter to her own bed.

Infant age

Psychologists believe that it is best to do everything necessary manipulations from the age of six months. An error of several weeks is allowed in any direction.

If your child does not want to sleep in his crib, then you need to use the following tips:

constantly monitor changes in reaction, it is best to put the baby to bed when tired, and not according to a pre-conceived schedule; if the baby is active, he will not immediately fall asleep, but will begin to ask to be held;
in children's consciousness certain processes should be connected, for example, the baby goes to bed immediately after bathing, and mommy or daddy can sing him a beautiful lullaby;
the baby should only be allowed to sleep in the crib; all other actions should also be performed in a place strictly determined by the parents;
babies fall asleep soundly immediately after feeding, in this case it is recommended to first place a diaper under them, 20 minutes after falling asleep you can transfer the baby to the nursery, the diaper will have time to absorb the pleasant smell of the mother, which the baby will constantly feel and sleep peacefully;
the younger the baby, the easier it is to teach him to sleep in new conditions;
Psychologists recommend creating an imitation of the mother’s womb for the baby. Some mothers practice tight swaddling from 4 to 8 weeks. Later, the meaning of its use will completely disappear.

If at 9 months the baby does not sleep in the crib on his own, it is very important for him to constantly maintain contact with his parents, then he should be constantly stroked and gently touched.

Important! In a year, weaning can become very painful. During this period, the baby will get used to sleeping together with his parents.

It is recommended to compensate for the lack of tactile sensations during the day. The answer to the question of how to teach a newborn to sleep separately is extremely simple. Parents must surround him with sufficient love and care. The baby should be picked up more often, stroked on the head and kissed. Such a demonstration of affection will significantly speed up the process.

Children over 2 years old

If a child does not sleep in a crib independently in a year, then parents will have to carry out the training process a little later.

Don't be upset about the omission. In any case, there will be time to catch up.

Psychologists consider it abnormal if at two years old a baby continues sleep with your parents.

The case concerns marital relations. To simplify the retraining process, it is recommended to use a number of tips.

It is necessary to find out why the child refuses to sleep independently. You should get used to the sleeping place gradually. It is allowed to use an additional version of the bed, so the baby will always be close to the parents. Gradually you should move it away.

The baby can independently choose a bed in which he is guaranteed to have sweet dreams. The sleeping area must be fully equipped. You can create comfort with the help of pillows and blankets. It's best to buy new pajamas. A child's room must have a night light.

It is allowed to involve older relatives for training. Other children will be able to set a positive example, and your baby will get the opportunity with pride show off your room.

At the first stage, you can only sleep in the crib during the day. Additionally, you should close the curtains and create a pleasant environment for relaxation. Mommy can give the baby a massage. Children quickly fall asleep after a walk in the fresh air. They should not be prohibited from running and playing actively.

Only after the baby is completely accustomed to falling asleep alone is it possible to turn off the night light completely. However, it should continue to be used in case of fears or individual preferences. If the baby is active all day, then by the evening he is guaranteed to feel tired. Overwork is unacceptable. It is important to find a “golden mean”.

Important! A woman should also feel morally prepared to sleep in a separate bed.

Over the past months, the mother has also gotten used to falling asleep and waking up next to her son or daughter. Not every woman on a subconscious level I’m already ready for such changes.

Common mistakes

The process of accustoming to a sleeping place will go quickly if both parties are psychologically ready for it.

However, most often mommy faces a problem when her son or daughter cannot fall asleep on their own in a new place.

In this case, you need to try to push into the background the main errors that hinder this process:

a son or daughter must not be frightened or scolded;
The night light should be constantly burning in the nursery for the first time;
mom and dad should always be together, they should have a common position and specific requirements;
It is not allowed to independently transfer a child to another room if he is already two years old; against the background of this process, the risk of neuroses and fears increases;
You cannot joke or laugh at a child’s fear;
the current situation also cannot be discussed with relatives or friends; this must be avoided if the conversation takes place in front of children;
if the baby cries for a long time in the crib, then the woman should not ignore it, and she is also not allowed to go to another room;
allow the baby to be in bed with his parents only in case of illness, but his deception or tricks should be stopped.

If a new addition to the family is expected soon, the eldest child must be transferred to his own bed in advance.

One of the main problems of young parents is the child and the crib. I want the baby to sleep in his own crib. This is safer than lying next to your mother, who can turn around in her sleep and inadvertently crush the baby. In addition, co-sleeping does not allow a tired woman to get enough sleep.

Psychologists say that a child is psychologically separated from his mother only at the age of 7 years. An infant still perceives the world outside of his mother very poorly. It is important for him to hear his native voice, feel the touch, feel the familiar beat of his mother’s heart. All this helps him cope with the anxiety of being in a new unfamiliar world.

But the mother is neither physically nor psychologically capable of being with the baby 24 hours a day. Yes, and it’s harmful for the baby. He needs to learn to be alone. This is necessary for the development of his mental and physical functions.

Note: If the baby is very anxious about the absence of his mother at night and does not want to sleep in the crib, you will have to meet him halfway. Then it is necessary to teach independent recreation gradually, without violence from parents. Otherwise, too much money will be paid for a separate sleep: the child’s nervous system.

Dangers of co-sleeping:

Child injury.
Moral and physical fatigue of the mother.
Delayed development of mental functions. Selfhood is a necessary condition for the full mental development of a child.
Cooling of feelings between mom and dad. Not every dad can handle three people sleeping together, and this, together with the general stressful situation in the house, can lead to increased conflict in the couple.

Remember, teaching a child to sleep separately from his parents is important, but it must be done correctly and in a timely manner. It is better to put a one-year-old baby who is breastfed up to 1 year without the habit of a pacifier during periods of vaccinations, teething and physical ailments to sleep where he likes. In all other cases, slowly move towards independent sleep.

Rules and methods for teaching independent sleep

There are many tricks and secrets on how to get through this stage without tears and hysterics:

It is easy to teach a child to sleep separately from his parents if you were able to do this at the maternity hospital stage. Does your baby sleep peacefully alone in the hospital? This means there is no need to drag him into a shared bed at home - he feels fine without it.
A calm pregnancy is an important condition for the child’s nervous health. Sleep for the required amount of time, do not overtire, avoid nervous overload, and the newborn will feel calm in a separate crib.
Correct daily routine. Active games in the first half of the day, calm ones in the afternoon. Mandatory daytime nap. Then the baby will come up in the evening tired, but not overtired, and will be able to fall asleep peacefully.
Correct rituals before bed. This is especially important for slightly older children. Bathing, bedtime story, sleep.
Gradually teach:

lie next to him for a while until he falls asleep;
just give us your hand;
do something near the baby;
Leave the door to the room open so he knows you're somewhere nearby.

It happens that a newborn categorically refuses to sleep independently when the family is uneasy. The general nervous environment exhausts even a baby. He will need the extra reassurance that comes from co-sleeping.

Download the sound of an adult’s heart from the Internet and play it while your child falls asleep. Pediatricians and psychologists say that the beating of the heart is as calming and soothing as a lullaby.

Dr. Komarovsky draws the attention of parents to the fact that rules and the general attitude towards the child on the part of the family are important in raising children. The baby is a member of the family system, but not the main one. There is no need to rearrange your whole life for your little one. We need to integrate him into the family. Therefore, the child must clearly understand that in the house there is a living space for himself (the crib) and others (the parents’ bed).

We train you to sleep separately by month

How to teach a newborn, one month old, or three month old baby to sleep in a crib on their own? Some mothers share their experience of smooth training using the following algorithm:

a baby up to 4 months falls asleep on his mother’s breast and is transferred to a crib;
at 5-6 months, the mother rocks the baby in her arms to a lullaby;
11 months - 1 year, just with a song.

At 7, 8, 9 and 10 months, everything depends on the teething process. The baby may sleep restlessly due to pain in the gums. In such cases, use a special anesthetic liquid. It will relieve pain and the little one will sleep more peacefully.

It is important to know! The crib only works as a place to fall asleep instantly when it is used only for sleeping. The baby woke up, take him from there. Let him play and eat in other places. Place it in the crib only when the baby is ready to sleep.

At 1.5 years old, you can and should diversify your falling asleep rituals. Add to them a soft toy, putting on pajamas, reading a book. At 2-3 years old, the next step is a separate bed. If your child is afraid, first place the bed next to yours. Make moving into your own room feel like a holiday.

Good afternoon, dear readers! Many mothers are afraid to sleep with their young children. It seems to them that if the baby is not used to sleeping separately from birth, then it will be very difficult to “move” him somewhere.

There is even an opinion that the sooner you start teaching your child to sleep separately, the easier it is to do... How to teach a child to sleep in his own crib? In this article I will talk about methods applied to children of different ages and share my experience.

Separate sleep from birth

On the one hand, there is nothing complicated here. Just put the baby to sleep in the crib. And every time I get up to see him at night.

If mom is ready to get up many times during the night and this does not affect her well-being, there is probably nothing terrible about it. But we must keep in mind that the vast majority of children wake up very often.

Are you ready for such a feat? Personally, I don’t. I was afraid of sleeping together with my eldest daughter for two whole months; I got up to the child 10-20 times a night. And at one point I decided that I had enough. She began to place the baby next to her and breastfeed for every squeak. That's when I started getting enough sleep.

A good video that can help teach a baby to sleep if he is less than a year old:

How to teach your baby to sleep separately from birth?

From the very beginning, place the baby in a separate crib. If he wakes up in the process of shifting, try again and again until you achieve success;
Every time the child cries at night, get up, take him in your arms, calm him down, and put him back in the crib.

I will not talk about those methods when babies are left alone to cry, teaching them to sleep without waking up. For me, such methods are unacceptable.

Co-sleeping up to 1-2 years

Many mothers prefer to place their children next to them until they are 1-2 years old. Thanks to this, they do not have to constantly jump up in the first year of life, when children's sleep is so intermittent.

At one or two years old it is still difficult to explain anything to a child. Therefore, the scheme for accustoming a baby to a crib is extremely simple:

We teach you to fall asleep in a crib. First, we sit next to each other, stroke, read books, sing songs. Then we gradually reduce our actions.
when the child wakes up at night, we put him back in his crib. Stroking, soothing or something else.

If the child is sleeping soundly, you can put him to sleep where he is used to, and then transfer him to the crib. But some children may get scared when they wake up in a different place.

Another experience of a young mother:

Therefore, if the baby falls asleep only next to you, the easiest way to move him into bed is to first go to bed with him and lie next to him until the baby falls asleep. When the baby wakes up at night, come to him again. And after a while, gradually learn to fall asleep on your own.

Some mothers at this age do not try to ensure that the child sleeps in the crib all night until the morning. And they allow the baby to come to them in the morning and sleep together.

Co-sleeping up to 3-5 years

From my point of view, this is the best option. And the simplest... The child is already big. He is already ready to sleep separately. Everything can be explained to him. You might be interested. And crib training is often extremely easy.

The first step is to create a buzz around the crib. For some time, draw the child’s attention to how big children sleep in their beds, give examples of friends, characters from fairy tales. Together, choose a new crib for your child... But promise to buy it only when he is very big (after his next birthday or some special day, after he does something special, learns to count to 20, etc. ). That is, sleeping in your own bed is a special honor, the highest reward. It's prestigious, cool, attractive.

Typically, children aged 3-5 years old want to be big. And such ideas are received with a bang. The main thing is not to rush things.

Then you ceremoniously buy a crib. If the baby has never fallen asleep without you, help him fall asleep there... At night, you can remind him that he is now big and can sleep in the bed... And so on. It is done.

If the bed is already standing, we also gradually tell you how all big children sleep in cribs. We doubt that our baby is already that big... But at some point we allow him to sleep there.

For some children, you can simply promise something good if they prove their maturity by sleeping in bed for 10 days straight. It worked for us with ease.

Our experience

I taught my daughter to sleep in her crib at age 4. The bed had been standing for a long time and was quite small. I sometimes put my daughter to bed there under the pretext “Let you lie in the crib, and I’ll read you a book/give you a massage.” But since I didn’t behave very competently before, my attitude towards the bed was negative. At night, my daughter always returned to us.

When my daughter turned 4 years old, I realized that she was ready to sleep alone. And since we still needed to buy a new bed, I decided to go the following way...

From time to time I pointed out to my daughter that her older friends were sleeping in their beds. She saw their beds at a party... And she wanted the same ones.

No problem! I promised her that we would buy a beautiful crib when my daughter learned to sleep on her own. Otherwise, why buy? They buy beds only for those who sleep themselves!

In addition, I taught my daughter to fall asleep without me. Again, first we looked at photos of cribs on the Internet... We chose the right one, admired it... And I said that for this Lisa needs to fall asleep herself.

All. Since then, Lisa has been sleeping alone. Never comes to us at night. It's been 4 months already.

A couple of years ago I was afraid that learning to sleep separately would have to be done through tears, with great difficulty... I was ready to go through any work, for me it’s better to sleep peacefully for 4 years and only suffer for a month with moving out... Than to jump and ride at night.

So, I didn’t need to make any effort to wean myself off co-sleeping. Just show my daughter’s friends on the bed a few times and promise a new crib... Which I was going to buy anyway.

Our youngest son has been sleeping with us since birth. And I also plan to leave co-sleeping for up to 3-4 years. And then he will be easily attracted by the idea of sleeping alone, like his older sister... Even now he really wants to sleep in his sister’s place. But now I myself am not ready for such a turn of events, since it is not finished yet. And getting up at night... I have no such desire.

For me, co-sleeping is an opportunity to sleep at night, almost never getting up... Someone complains that sleeping like this is very crowded. For this, I can only recommend buying a wide sofa. Instead of spending money on cribs, it is better to buy a cheap wide sofa! Cheap - so as not to cry every time the baby pees (day or night). Or - he will paint with a ballpoint pen.

Co-sleeping helps your baby feel safe. And it helps the mother feel the child. This is just a few years of life... Which can be filled as much as possible with warmth and closeness to the baby. When the child is ready, he easily begins to sleep separately. And it’s even a pity that kids grow up so quickly.

Good videos about children’s sound sleep from a specialist - look here.

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